Ep 34: "I don't want my remaining brothers to sacrifice themselves anymore" (meta)

[china_shop]

I'm just going to look at the first few lines of the young Envoy and Kunlun's conversation on the clifftop in YOHE (ep 34, 38:28-39:56). (I hope someone either does a proper scene post for this scene sometime, or people pick other excerpts to bounce off/look at in depth, because the YOHE conversations are just crammed full of delicious character moments and juicy potential meta!)

Viki subs, very slightly edited by me.


The Envoy and Kunlun have a serious talk as they take a moonlit stroll.

Envoy: A thousand brothers put their faith in me, but now only a few are left.
上千个兄弟 那么的信任我 可如今却没剩几个了
A peace obtained in exchange for blood -- for those who have bled, is it really fair?
用鲜血去换取的和平 对于那些流血的人来说 真的公平吗

Kunlun: But you would still choose this road -- sacrificing a few people in exchange for thousands of years of peace for the majority. You just lack the final step before you can fulfill it.
可你还是会选这条路 以少数人的牺牲 来换取多数人千百年来的安生 只差最后一步就可以实现了


The Envoy has had a really crappy day war; Kunlun is supportive in a "keep going, it's worth it" kind of way.

Envoy: But I must take this step on my own. I don't want my remaining brothers to sacrifice themselves anymore.
可是这一步 我必须自己去走 我不想让剩下来的兄弟 再去牺牲了
Kunlun: You still have me.
你还有我

Kunlun steals the mask and compliments Shen Wei's looks, then:

Kunlun: No, why do you insist on wearing this ugly mask?
不是 你没事总戴这么丑不拉几面具干吗呀


The Envoy looks down at the mask that is the only face he ever shows anyone.

Envoy: When I am killing my enemies, I will feel afraid. When I put on this mask, they can't see my expression. They will think that I do not get afraid. Then they will be scared of me instead.
我杀敌的时候 会害怕 我戴上这个面具 敌人就看不到我的表情了 他们以为 我不会害怕 自然就会怕我了


Zhao Yunlan is a little bit heartbroken, but Shen Wei is pleased with his plan to hide any sign of vulnerability.

I was having a great conversation about this exchange recently, and thinking about it, I started to wonder how much it's intended to be read in the context (which we don't get until ep 40) of bb!Shen Wei's encounter with the future Rebel Chieftain.


BB!Shen Wei disagrees with the future leader of the Rebels about whether murder is okay.


The future leader of the Rebels does not take criticism well.

What I mean is that, long before the Rebel Army was assembled, the not-yet-Chieftain tried to recruit bb!Shen Wei, they argued about morality, and the future Chieftain threw the future Envoy over a cliff and appeared to kill his brother.

In light of this, the Envoy's soldiers repeatedly dying in battle against that same man must be pretty traumatic, right? The worst moment of my life keeps happening again and again! Every soldier who dies this way must remind him of his failure to protect Didi. In the conversation with Kunlun, he even refers to his soldiers as "a thousand brothers" and "my remaining brothers."

This also neatly explains why the fearsome Envoy might sometimes be afraid in battle.


The Rebel Chieftain advances. The Envoy is wounded. At least three of the Envoy's men are down,
and the remainder are hurt and terribly outnumbered while still valiantly trying to hold the Chieftain at bay.)


The Envoy is backed against a cliff, losing ground, with unsteady footing.


The Envoy looks down at his inevitable fate. The Rebel Chieftain smirks like
"I already threw you over one cliff and killed your only surviving family -- I'm gonna do it again."

I think it's really telling that in the first YOHE battle we see, the Envoy is backed towards a cliff by the same man who dropped him over a cliff and murdered his twin years before. It's very natural for that to be frightening. (And fwiw, given how unpractised the Envoy is at confiding in people, I think he only manages to be so candid about his fear with Kunlun because a) Kunlun is a very good listener for him specifically, b) Kunlun has unhesitatingly vowed to fight at his side and obviously cares about him, and c) only that afternoon, the Rebel Chieftain unmasked Shen Wei and smirked at the fear on his face. Whether hiding his fear was his motive for first adopting the mask or not, it's the salient reason for him tonight, fresh from that confrontation.)

What's more, I think it's reasonable for Shen Wei to have the impression that the Rebel Chieftain is particularly violent towards the Envoy's army because of their history (and he might even be right: the Chieftain has good reason to want to off Shen Wei before he learns Ye Zun has been enslaved, and he doesn't want Ye Zun discovering the truth about what happened, either). If the Envoy feels like his men are getting caught in the crossfire of a personal vendetta, that would make the burden of his losses fall even more heavily on his shoulders.

Accordingly, the young Envoy resolves that, from here on out, he'll go it alone.

I don't think the Envoy is scared in general or flinches from violence, and I don't think he's a martyr. I think he's specifically afraid of failing to protect those who depend on him and, especially, of failing to protect them from That Particular Asshole. Kunlun saved him from that failure, in that first battle we see, and that's one of the reasons Kunlun's arrival made such a profound difference in the Envoy's life, even before they'd really had a chance to talk.

In conclusion, my theory goes: 1) Shen Wei was traumatised by his first meeting with the Rebel Chieftain-to-be, and this informs every choice he makes thereafter; 2) it's quite possible the Rebel Chieftain is specifically targeting the Envoy and his men, for personal reasons as well as broader strategic ones, ugh; and 3) Kunlun is everything that is good in the world, wrapped up in one extremely attractive package.

Q1. Do you agree with this interpretation?

Q2. There are lots of reasons why Shen Wei might have begun wearing a mask -- for example, to hide his youth and inexperience as well as his fear. If it was just about intimidating his enemies, why keep wearing it amongst his allies? Maybe he felt he needed to impress Fu You and Ma Gui so they would allow him to join their alliance. Maybe masks are part of Dixing culture, cf all the masked customers in the bar in ep 17. Do you have a theory for how it started? (Links to fanworks on this subject also very welcome!)

Q3. If Kunlun hadn't arrived just then, when the Envoy was at his lowest, would the Envoy have stuck with his decision to continue on alone, even if it risked losing the war? Would his remaining soldiers, who were fighting because they believed in him and the cause, have just stood by while he tried to sideline them? Would Ma Gui and Fu You have attempted to persuade him to use every tool at his disposal to win? (I feel like ZYL being there and stepping up meant that none of these questions got answered, but some of the Envoy's men do turn up just as Shen Wei follows Ye Zun into the energy seal, so either the Envoy hadn't told them to stand down yet, or they were defying orders.)

Q4. How awful was it for Shen Wei to realise that Ye Zun had taken his enemy's place (and in some sense, literally become him, given Ye Zun ate him and absorbed his power?).

Comments

[awanderingcoyote]

AHH! What an excellent post!!!! So much goodness to dig into here :D

Q1. Do you agree with this interpretation? I agree that SW is not one to be scared of violence or fights, in the whole fitefitefite sense of it, but that it's the whole letting the people who fight by his side down, which could lead to injury and/or death depending on the situation. That responsibility that Shen Wei is so good at shouldering and taking ownership of. Combine that with the Rebel leader being something of Darth Vader for him (sorry my brain is stuck in Star Wars land right now) as both proof of his failure to protect those he loves (Ye Zun), but also the mistakes he's made (not protecting Ye Zun as well as whatever perceived mistakes have been made in previous battles he's had with him) is like a constant running the gauntlet for young Shen Wei. My brain can't find better words but hopefully the above makes sense :D :D

Q2. There are lots of reasons why Shen Wei might have begun wearing a mask -- for example, to hide his youth and inexperience as well as his fear. If it was just about intimidating his enemies, why keep wearing it amongst his allies? Maybe he felt he needed to impress Fu You and Ma Gui so they would allow him to join their alliance. Maybe masks are part of Dixing culture, cf all the masked customers in the bar in ep 17. Do you have a theory for how it started? (Links to fanworks on this subject also very welcome!) - I like this a lot. Perhaps also to hide his own expressions from everyone as well. He's younger here and perhaps doesn't have complete control of hiding everything he feels behind what we see in present-day with the 'polite innocent professor' mask he deploys to throw people off his scent. And perhaps the masked scene in the bar became something because of Hei Pao Shi wearing one! Though my brain always felt that the masks were worn to give a subtle nod to the book, where from what I understand they were ghosts/demons (I have not read the book so I could totally be wrong here), but I'm down for YOHE HPS starting a new trend which gets incorporated into their culture/beliefs/etc.

Q3. If Kunlun hadn't arrived just then, when the Envoy was at his lowest, would the Envoy have stuck with his decision to continue on alone, even if it risked losing the war? Would his remaining soldiers, who were fighting because they believed in him and the cause, have just stood by while he tried to sideline them? Would Ma Gui and Fu You have attempted to persuade him to use every tool at his disposal to win? (I feel like ZYL being there and stepping up meant that none of these questions got answered, but some of the Envoy's men do turn up just as Shen Wei follows Ye Zun into the energy seal, so either the Envoy hadn't told them to stand down yet, or they were defying orders.) - My brain goes to it depends on the situation at hand-ish? XD Like perhaps if that was the only thing they had left to try to win the war, he'd go down the road of self-sacrificing, but I think with the people and the soldiers, and everything they're trying to do as a group Shen Wei wouldn't go off on his to do that. He's a general for a reason - smart, tactics, powerful, etc - and even though he's young, he surely knows that one person against an army rarely works, no matter how strong they are power wise.

Q4. How awful was it for Shen Wei to realise that Ye Zun had taken his enemy's place (and in some sense, literally become him, given Ye Zun ate him and absorbed his power?). - I think pretty devastating. I'm not sure my brain can put into words what it wants to right this moment, so let me ponder more and I will add a second comment :D

AHH this was such a great write-up/meta post!!!! I have more words but I must run to work, but I wanted to post a reply to this awesome post!!

[china_shop]

I agree that SW is not one to be scared of violence or fights, in the whole fitefitefite sense of it, but that it's the whole letting the people who fight by his side down, which could lead to injury and/or death depending on the situation. That responsibility that Shen Wei is so good at shouldering and taking ownership of. Combine that with the Rebel leader being something of Darth Vader for him (sorry my brain is stuck in Star Wars land right now) as both proof of his failure to protect those he loves (Ye Zun), but also the mistakes he's made (not protecting Ye Zun as well as whatever perceived mistakes have been made in previous battles he's had with him) is like a constant running the gauntlet for young Shen Wei.

Yes, I agree. I feel like that worry is happening at a fairly background level -- it's not like he ever freezes in a fight or gets really unnerved -- but the awareness of it must always be there, that constant protecting those around him and guarding against failure. *pets him* (Hee! The Star Wars parallel is making me grin. :D :D :D)

I like this a lot. Perhaps also to hide his own expressions from everyone as well. He's younger here and perhaps doesn't have complete control of hiding everything he feels behind what we see in present-day with the 'polite innocent professor' mask he deploys to throw people off his scent.

He's definitely very open with Kunlun, isn't he? It would be so interesting to see how he was with other people in YOHE, without his mask. How much composure he has. I wish we saw more of that. (I find wearing a mask makes me lazier about having expressions and more likely to talk out loud to myself -- maybe he's just out of practice at thinking about what it's like to show his face to people, and that's why he's so open? :-)

And perhaps the masked scene in the bar became something because of Hei Pao Shi wearing one!

Hee! That would be funny, considering Shen Wei and alcohol. :D :D :D

Though my brain always felt that the masks were worn to give a subtle nod to the book, where from what I understand they were ghosts/demons (I have not read the book so I could totally be wrong here)

Oh, of course. I haven't read the book either, so I forget to factor that in. *facepalm* Thanks for making that connection! :-)

My brain goes to it depends on the situation at hand-ish? XD Like perhaps if that was the only thing they had left to try to win the war, he'd go down the road of self-sacrificing, but I think with the people and the soldiers, and everything they're trying to do as a group Shen Wei wouldn't go off on his to do that. He's a general for a reason - smart, tactics, powerful, etc - and even though he's young, he surely knows that one person against an army rarely works, no matter how strong they are power wise.

Yeah, I completely agree. It would just be too great a risk unless he had a strategy for actually turning the tide somehow. I think he's just feeling a bit hopeless here, because of what happened in the battle, and unlike Fu You and Ma Gui, he hasn't talked to future ZYL, so he doesn't know they're going to win.

Thanks so much for your comment. Really great thoughts! <3 <3 <3