sid_guardian | Guardian Readalong: Vol. 3, Chapters 3 & 4

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Guardian Readalong: Vol. 3, Chapters 3 & 4

Welcome aboard for this week's chapters of our Guardian readalong!

Here are last week's chapters (the beginning of vol. 3). You can find all previous discussions on the schedule post (part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4), or via the !readalong tag.

This week's chapters:

Chapter 3: Zhao Yunlan escapes his father's scolding, keeps falling asleep, and is fed medicine by Shen Wei. Zhu Hong gets a visit from her uncle, who wants her to leave Dragon City. Zhao Yunlan surprises Shen Wei in the kitchen cutting his own chest with a knife, and learns what medicine Shen Wei has been feeding him.
Chapter 4: Zhao Yunlan sleeps at the SID, and the team gossips about it. Shen Wei brings clothes while he's asleep. Zhu Hong refuses to leave Zhao Yunlan's side, gives him a gift from her uncle, and offers to sever ties with her tribe if he wants her to stay.

The corresponding part in the Chinese version on JJWXC/the fan translation are chapters 81-82.

Excerpts:

1) Shen Wei feeds Zhao Yunlan medicine

The noise in his ears only intensified, growing from a mere clamor to a cacophony. Zhao Yunlan knew he was dreaming, but the knowledge didn't free him. He remained ensnared in the dream, as if he'd fallen into a bog that was swallowing him up. The more he struggled, the less he could breathe.

Then a bowl that smelled of something raw was pressed to his lips. Ignoring his struggles, the person holding it pried his mouth open and forced him to take the medicine. Zhao Yunlan resisted instinctively, trying to push the stuff back out of his mouth with his tongue. The person seemed to sigh. Then hands cradled his head, and soft lips pressed against his. A familiar scent momentarily quieted Zhao Yunlan's thoughts of protest, and the other person seized their chance to make him swallow the medicine.

Zhao Yunlan's eyes flew open as he started coughing and found himself already home in bed. Dazed, he watched as Shen Wei set down the bowl and brought him a cup of tea that was at the perfect temperature. Shen Wei ducked his head and touched their foreheads together. "Here," he said. "Drink this and rinse your mouth."

Zhao Yunlan accepted the tea. His heavy lashes were lowered, and a trace of cold sweat from his nightmare still beaded his forehead. In a single gulp, he drank the tea to the last drop before asking hoarsely, "Did I catch a cold? Why am I getting sick so easily lately?"

There was a curious pause before Shen Wei replied, "It's nothing. Your time within the Great Divine Tree took too much of your energy."

"Oh." After a long look, Zhao Yunlan continued, deliberately drawing out each word, "I thought maybe..." Shen Wei's spine stiffened, only for him to hear the dumbass conclude, with a bit of a lilting whine, "I was carrying your child."

2) Kitchen scene: Shen Wei is caught

The other side of the bed was empty and already cold to the touch. It was impossible to say how long Shen Wei had been gone.

Startled, Zhao Yunlan sat up and saw light coming from the kitchen. He groped around the floor for his slippers, but when he couldn't find whatever corner they'd been kicked into, he headed for the kitchen barefoot.

Shen Wei was facing away, doing something with his hands as Zhao Yunlan entered. A little clay pot bubbled on the stove. The faint smell of a medicinal decoction wafted from the pot, as if Shen Wei was preparing some grand dish that needed to be stewed overnight.

Zhao Yunlan rubbed his eyes and walked over, rolling up his sleeves. "What are you making? I'll help-" His voice startled Shen Wei, who dropped what he'd been holding.

What clattered to the floor was a knife, dripping enough blood that the clean white cabinets were spattered when it landed. Zhao Yunlan broke off mid-sentence, pupils constricting. In an instant, all trace of sleepiness was gone. Shen Wei had been...had been cutting into his own chest .

3) Kitchen scene: Shen Wei explains

"Long ago...your left soul fire went missing, and your heart's blood became the Soul-Guarding Lamp's wick," Shen Wei responded, very low. "Your spirit was already weak. Your three souls were unstable. And for all that you forcibly elevated me to godhood, the fact remains that I was born from the Place of Great Disrespect. The gui are filthy and inauspicious. If you spend enough time in my presence, I'll start wearing you down. As I do, you'll become deficient in both qi and blood. Ultimately, I'll burn you out until there's nothing left."

Shen Wei dropped his gaze, hiding his ink-black eyes under lashes like crow feathers. Barely audible now, he said, "All those thousands of years ago, Shennong said that, as a King of the Gui, my life was fated to both begin and end badly. If you insist on protecting me and keeping me at your side, I'll inevitably kill you."

"So the 'medicine' I've been drinking has your blood in it... The purest blood from the tip of your heart." Zhao Yunlan's lips trembled. "That's your way of replenishing my 'lamp oil'?"

Shen Wei looked at him with a faint, soft smile. "Every part of me is dark, down to my very soul. Only the very tip of my heart is clean, and that's where I've kept you-where the blood runs red. I'll gladly use it to protect you."

4) Zhao Yunlan's dream

If it was at all possible, Zhao Yunlan wanted to regain Kunlun-jun's powers and true memories. Failing that, he at least wanted to know what was up with all these lies among truths, shrouded in layers of mystery, and learn what had motivated it all. He couldn't act rashly without seeing the full picture.

Shen Wei... The name alone overwhelmed Zhao Yunlan with worry. It was as though a flame was burning in his heart, steadily eating away at his energy, but he had to hold it in-and not only that, he had to seem outwardly peaceful while he was at it, as if he had everything under control.

He'd noticed at times that if he was just sitting there and no one else was around, his brow would furrow subconsciously. The same scene kept unfolding in his mind, no matter where he was or what he was doing: in some cold, dreary place, without a single beam of light or sign of life, Shen Wei was half swallowed by an endless darkness. Helpless to do anything but look up, Shen Wei desperately strained to glimpse the emerald seas and azure skies, but they were beyond him. His vision couldn't pierce the unending, absolute blackness. Sooner or later, inevitably succumbing to disappointment and despair, Shen Wei was slowly sucked away into the darkness...

Zhao Yunlan jolted awake as someone abruptly nudged him. He found his heart racing and his forehead beaded with sweat.

5) Zhu Hong's confession

Zhu Hong found her real feelings tumbling out of her mouth. "Director Zhao, just give me the word. One word and I'll sever all ties with my tribe and follow you to the end, through hell or high water."

It was as if she'd handed her whole life over on a silver platter, leaving her scared of Zhao Yunlan's response, but also anticipating it. However, a declaration of love was never guaranteed reciprocation. In the end, Zhao Yunlan still wouldn't meet her eyes.

"What do you mean?" he asked. "You and I have known each other for years, and we don't have any grudges against each other. Why can't I wish you well? As long as you're doing well, that's what matters to me."

The light in Zhu Hong's eyes flickered out.

Questions:

Do you like the worldbuilding around borrowing years? What do you think about the kitchen scene, and how it was adapted in the drama? Which is more intense? Which do you like better? Is Fourth Uncle right to make Zhu Hong leave? Do you think Zhao Yunlan actually wants Zhu Hong to stay, even if he won't say it? Does it help with understanding what's going on that Zhao Yunlan is actively trying to puzzle out what's true and what's a lie?

(As usual, these are just conversation starters - feel free to answer all, some, or none, and to say as much or as little as you like!)

Our current schedule (which is also where you can sign up to host a post - please do if you can!)

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"Plus, new relationship, lots of sex, all-night New Years Eve party, dealing with parents... it would be amazing if he wasn't tired! (But maybe this is a different quality of tiredness he can't put his finger on?)"

Yeah, I definitely think this is very different. It's only the "not that busy" part that is funny to me - I'm sure under normal circumstances this level of activity doesn't lead to (much) exhaustion for him, but it should probably still count as "busy" regardless. :D

"This is making me really appreciate that in the drama (iirc) she's politicised and says she has to stand with the SID. Being part of the team and protecting the world is a core part of her identity, on top of her crush. (The equivelent scene is in ep 30, 34:27.)"

Thank you for the time stamp and an excuse to rewatch. :D Yeah, the SID is not in danger in the novel, and they're not even involved in protecting the world all that much yet (or at least they don't know how much they're involved) - at this point this is still just a regular case, a regular job and regular co-workers, and she doesn't seem to care about them all that much, compared to how much she cares about Zhao Yunlan. I like the drama version better too, ftr. :)

"I guess I wish he'd distinguish between harmful and evil/filthy/wrong, though? Like, think of it more like an allergy and less like a judgement. You know?"

I feel like this quote ("Every part of me is dark, down to my very soul. Only the very tip of my heart is clean, and that’s where I’ve kept you—where the blood runs red."), unlike many of his other quotes, was pretty free of judgment? Just facts. Oh, unless 'clean' is a judgment, it could be. He does have a problem with his hands being not clean enough.

"Hm, I'm not sure about that? I think he's being forced into a worldview shift about his relationship, and that's sent him into a tailspin. (What does it mean for them that SW is physically harmful to him? What does it say about SW? And then there's the lying, the forced medicating, etc. Can he still trust SW?). But no one's ever forced him into the relationship (quite the opposite!), and in the kitchen scene, he was the one who left, so to me it seems like LJ is pretty wide of the mark. Maybe I'm being overly literal, tho."

ITA that all of these are factors too, but I was referring to his train of thought in this scene:

"If Shen Wei didn’t like him and kept him at a distance, Zhao Yunlan could either choose to keep pestering him or choose to back away gracefully. To advance or retreat were both reasonable options.

If Shen Wei lied to him, hurt him, or wronged him, Zhao Yunlan had the choice to either forgive him or walk out of his life forever. Once again, it was reasonable to either advance or retreat.

But Shen Wei had woven him into his web, and Zhao Yunlan was unable to scold him, curse at him, or hate him…and equally unable to accept his actions."

It does sort of translate to feeling like he's being forced into a relationship and being forced into a breakup at the same time (AND unable to do either). At least to me. :)

"So she must be fairly old, right? And now I'm going, it would be hilarious if ZYL was the second youngest person at the SID (after Xiao Guo). :D He maintains his authority via job title and sheer chutzpah ~~and divine right, I guess, given the Soul Guarding Order~~. :D (Do we know how old Lin Jing is?)"

She is old, and I'm under the impression that every powerful(ish) yao is old, because of how long it takes for them to cultivate. (There's a scene later where Zhu Hong says to Zhao Yunlan, "In my tribe, someone your age would still be nibbling their eggshells, you mortal brat!", which I find hilarious so I'm just going to quote it even though the readalong is not there yet. :D) No idea about Lin Jing, but even if he's younger than ZYL, it still doesn't change much about how young he is compared to everyone else. :D (ETA: Oh, and then as Kunlun he's literally the oldest, by far. :D)

"In the novel, Shen Wei has just given him answers, but in the drama, he gives him more questions. ZYL is standing there, grappling with confusion and would probably ask more once he'd formulated a single thought. And also, in the novel, by leaving, ZYL is removing the reason for SW's cutting; in the drama, SW's cutting isn't motivated by ZYL at all -- Shen Wei is the one feeling like crap, and he wants to go away and deal with it in private (I think?)."

Yessss, THIS. ♡♡♡ And now that the lock thing was explained to me, I'm glad that these are the only reasons for the change. :D

(...OMG, why did it literally only JUST hit me that SW is doing this in ZYL's apartment when the cutting has nothing to do with ZYL? He's not making anything for ZYL in the drama? He could do it at his own place, later or earlier, or if he has to do it at this very moment he could just go to his own apartment accross the literal hall for a bit? How does it not directly imply that THIS IS HIS HOME. xD)

Edited 2025-05-24 15:48 (UTC)

"But most of the ones he owns are in pretty good condition, aren't they?"

Every time a coat gets clawed even once, he just buys a new one (or a few new ones)? ;D It would go with the 'wasteful and likes shiny stuff' thing. :D

"Maybe she does the computer support for the SID, since Lin Jing isn't techy in the novel?"

Oooh, good idea! I'm not sure who does what exactly (other than Wang Zheng doing HR), but this would definitely make sense. :D

"And to change that, you'd either need to change your state of being, or else change the laws of the universe. (Which I'm all in favour of, here! Change the way things work, please! But easier said from the outside, LOL.)"

I have no idea if this comes up, or maybe if it's contradicted by something obvious, but Kunlun is the only actual god left, isn't he? Maybe he can just do some god stuff and change some of this bullshit post-canon. :D

"Maybe it could be like a polarity thing or magnetic poles? Maybe they could find a way to make him extra super auspicious instead? *wants*"

AW, yes please! :D :D

Oh! Yes, that's a great point, this planet could have weird seasons! Maybe long seasons, or maybe proper winter only happens every few years, that would be fun to play with! *contemplates planetary orbits*

That is so fascinating to me. I'd be extremely surprised to find a flat or house door that could be opened without a key, I've never seen that!

Omgggg, I'm making icons of my art, and the one with this scene was the first time I made, and only then I realized that I can't actually use it here. ;D (Because the comm is not age-restricted and an icon can't be avoided.)

That is so cool that you're making icons from your art! I love that. (I don't think you need to worry about using it here, though, nothing's actually visible.)

I do think "clean" (with its implication that the rest of him is dirty/unclean) is definitely a judgment, and in this context, so is "dark". Unfortunately. :(

and I'm under the impression that every powerful(ish) yao is old, because of how long it takes for them to cultivate

Yeah, agreed, that's definitely a thing.

SW is doing this in ZYL's apartment when the cutting has nothing to do with ZYL?

Yes! That's a great point. I mean, he's there because he agreed to stay with ZYL for one more night (that's in the dialogue), but either the cutting was so urgently necessary that he couldn't wait a moment longer, or he just couldn't bring himself to leave - but at the same time, him being there for no reason in particular just really makes it obvious how much they're basically living together at this point. ♥ ♥ ♥

Every time a coat gets clawed even once, he just buys a new one (or a few new ones)? ;D It would go with the 'wasteful and likes shiny stuff' thing. :D

LOVE. :D

(ZYL is just lucky that drama!Da Qing doesn't spend that much time in cat form, compared to novel!Daqing. *g*)

I have no idea how much of this is something a god can change, and how much is the Heavens, but either way it definitely needs to be changed pronto!

Now I'm confused? :) I meant I only know locks where you need a key to open the door and you need a key to lock it. Without a key nothing happens at all. What I haven't considered/seen is a door that can be locked without a key. :)

Yeah, idk either, but if one goddess (basically equal to Kunlun, I think? even though he was a kid then) could literally create the entire humanity, I feel like one god can do a lot, even if not everything. :D

Now I'm confused too, LOL.

This is what I've been talking about: when you close the door from the outside, it will be shut and can only be opened again with a key. You don't need a key to achieve that, so the person who leaves doesn't need to have a key.

LOL, sorry for the confusion. ♡♡♡ The self-locking type of door is what I've never seen irl (outside of a hotel). :D So I never considered ZYL could have one of those, but I'm glad it seems to be the case. :D

Oh okay, thanks. :D ♡♡♡ *takes the Word of Mod and runs with it* xD I promise not to use any icons where anything is actually visible, lol, but also I'll most likely just never make those anyway because my available icon space may be vast but it's not unlimited, and if I can't use it here then where else am I gonna use it. :D :D

Hmm, if 'dark' is a judgment then I feel like any description of the harm he's causing would be a judgment? Which, yeah, if comes out of SW's mouth it probably always would be. But does it mean that there's no way to refer to it in a neutral way, regardless of attitude?

I think within the frame of the existing worldbuilding, there's no way to describe it in a neutral way because within that worldbuilding it isn't neutral. Or that's how I understand it, anyway.

Yep, and I also feel like doing something this personal/intimate not at home when there's no particular reason for it (ZYL is not in any immediate danger, is asleep and doesn't need SW right now, and his apartment is meters away; and that's assuming the cutting is urgent) makes a lot less sense than 'he IS in fact doing this at home'. :)

I really love that. :D

That's really bleak. :( It would mean that there isn't difference between Shen Wei actively hating himself and him just describing what the facts are? I feel like there should be a difference, if only for him to be able to make progress.

IKR, this realization is making me so happy rn. :D ♡♡♡ The drama couldn't get away with leaving some space for Shen Wei in the bed, but they could get away with this because it's sneaky af, and I think it's in a way even more meaningful than the bed would be. :D

I mean, maybe I'm wrong? But my impression is definitely that the worldbuilding is just stacked against him. His self-hatred is internalising that rather than railing against the unfairness of it all.

And isn't that part of the ending, too, offering the gui a way out of that inherently unfair state of being they're trapped in? That's how I remember it, anyway, though I'm none too clear on any details.

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Page 3 of 5

Guardian Readalong: Vol. 3, Chapters 3 & 4

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